Monday, January 14, 2013

Camino Entry 43

No street view today, because I'm up in the mountains:

Monastery ruins in Foncebadon.
Entry 43, January 6th, 2012

Very beautiful country today. We're climbing up through the foothills to the Cruz de Ferro. A bit stony, but nothing as bad as the Camino Catalán.

Ernesto was really hurting today. He ended the day yesterday with two huge new blisters on the outside of his right heel. He was slow coming out of the cafe today after 8km, and so I decided to walk with him for the rest of the day. He needed someone to walk with to keep his mind off of the pain and to give him energy – he is such a talkative, social person that it powers him. I was glad that I could give him that.

He barely made it to Foncebadon. It is a beautiful little half-ruined village up in the mountains. He will take a day off tomorrow along with Chan Hee, while Master, Kwang-sik, Wan Woo, and Rosa push onward. I will go on as well, but likely at a slower pace than the remaining Koreans.

The albergue is lovely. Two stories, stone, with a small and very hot fireplace. They have a little shop, practice yoga, and make their own yogurt and honey (which has my stomach a little bit upset). It will be a nice place to take a day off, but my gut tells me to keep going. Monte Irago is a must-revisit if I ever do this again.
The albergue in Foncebadon, and one of the only inhabited buildings.
Time to walk my own pace.

I picked up a book at random from the shelf – “Women, food, and God,” about dealing with eating disorders. The sentence that stuck with me is “The way we deal with food is how we deal with life.” I always eat too fast and for comfort – and I'm too focused on arriving in Santiago. From now on I practice eating the way I want to walk.

Enlightenment is following one thing all the way through to the end.” – Zen Master Shunryu Suzuki Roshi

Dieting was like praying . . . surely there must be a reward for those who know how horrible they are. And precisely because dieting and bingeing were the main ways that I was expressing my despair, the consequences of not dieting or bingeing were staggering. Making the decisions to stop dieting was like committing heresy, like breaking a vow that was never supposed to be broken.” pg. 23.

This is how I feel/felt about practicing music, and this is what I must fix to be happy.

She talks about the desire to bolt – I felt that today. The desire to avoid being fully alive, to escape the current moment. I was angry. I didn't want to be on the camino. All I wanted was a big dinner! Ha. No more of this. From now on I take that feeling and revel in it, embrace the anger like how I stood on the hilltop on the meseta. I am supposed to feel!  It is internal weather. And next time I am angry at the camino, I will fucking hate it as hard as I can!

Expenses, Day 43
Albergue: 6.00
Dinner: 8.00
Total: 14.00
Trip Total: 985.71

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